Dinner Table Diplomat T-Shirts

'It's gluten-free or free range or something. Enjoy.'

Reverse psychology

"No, I'm not interested in your list of endangered vegetables. Just eat your dinner."

"Think of it as Meatloaf 2.0."

'My dad must like you, or he would have charged by now.'

'It started out with lactose, but ow he's intolerant of everything.'

'That's it - I'm leaving home!'

"Do you have to mime looking at your mobile at the dinner table Marceau?"

Screen Time at the Dining Table

"This is a green vegetable, Mom. You wouldn't want me to break a new year's resolution, would you?"

"But stew is just everything I don't like in gravy."

"Do you know I fought an hour with that salmon you're eating."

"Nice place. What are the metal things for?"

'No, there's nothing else: At this time of year, we eat salmon!'

"Ambitions . . . never, ever to eat broccoli again."

'Can you get a move on with my dinner? The football will be on in ten minutes.'

'Dear, are you still mad at me, or do we always eat okra casserole 4 nights a week?'

'If you don't like my steak & kidney pudding Nigel, just say so.'

'For once can't we all just sit down and eat as a family?'

"With religion and politics off the table, the only thing left to argue about is gluten."

Mom taught me stamina

"Waiter, our son is a tasteless schmuck!"

Tasty Time: Family-Style Restaurant

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

"I believe I'll skip the appetizer. I ate the flowers."

"No dessert until you finish your dark matter."

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

"So are you can't cook or won't cook?"

"Those are insightful and legitimate questions about our country, Tommy, and if times were different, your mom and I probably wouldn't have to report you to the government for asking them!"

'Do I have to give thanks for all the spinach, or just the bite I'm going to eat?'

Thanksgiving Family Get-Togethers

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

"How many times have I told you? No trading Asian market at the dinner table."