Dinner Plans T-Shirts

'I'll be late for dinner - a shelf fell on me.'

'I sent out for everything.'

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

"The food isn't bad, but I don't care much for the floor show!"

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

"OK, duty roster for today: Ken is to scout for entrees, Tim for mains and of course, Tina for desserts..."

The ecumenical dinner party.

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

Mrs. Robot attempts to improve her family's diet.

"Tia Carmen, if you had a bucket list, what would you put in it?"

'I'll be conducting Mahler 3 as the guests arrive.'

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

'May I recommend the unlimited slop trough?'

"I'd like to order the baked sea bass, but I see it's off the menu."

"Dig in. It's a medallion-of-veal look-alike."

"You have reservations for 7 o'clock? Ideally..."

"This time when they show us their latest acquisition, we'll gush regardless."

'Okay, that's 4 for the Malbec, 3 for the Chianti and 2 for the Merlot. You want to go with that, or wait for the write-in votes?'

'Order fast, folks - the prices have an expiration date.'

"Now let's share a moment of silence in memory of our portfolio."

'Thanks for inviting me to dinner - it's really great!'

'Tartar sauce?! Heavens no. My dentist would kill me.'

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

"I'm not trying to change you. That's the personal trainer I hired's job."

"Oh -- I've got one! If you could have dinner with anyone from history, living or dead, who would you have cater it?"

Redneck Relative Thanksgiving

'I wish somebody would invent the TABLE!'

'You folks just sit right there and I'll go kill some hors d'oeuvres.'

'You talk about her so much. Why don't you invite that Alma Mater of yours to dinner sometime?'

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

'How does pizza for dinner sound to you?'

"Rosalie's signature chicken dish is simplicity itself."