Dinner Party Dreamer T-Shirts

"It was great seeing you - we'll have to have you two over once the kids have grown up and left for college."

'Ta Da! A brand new set of festive outdoor dinnerware for all my summer entertaining!!'

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Counting ribs

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

"You do like octopus?"

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

It's not because I'm nervous. The reason I'm not eating is because I really do have butterflies in my stomach.

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

Dinner at the Trapdoors

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

"Rump roast?"

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

"Joel! Killer crust!"

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

"Gesundheit!"

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

'The Ambassador will not be pleased, Madame.'