Diner Connoisseur Gifts

'He's just joking - they've had a long day in surgery.'

Two scottish gentleman debating over having Welsh rabbit

"We're out of today's soup, but you can have tomorrow's soup from yesterday which is the same as today's."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

"I come here for the pepper."

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

'Pigs feet, sir?' 'Are they pickled?'

'Who gets the decaf?'

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

Full English Breakfast.

A burgandy from when the dow hit a record high.

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

"Regular service or affected?"

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."

'The food is great, but it's embarrassing the way she always insists on burping you.'

this bordeaux speaks for itself

'Do I really have to remind you again about which one of us earns the truffles, Jean-Claude?'

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

"Eggshell in omelette make Hulk angry!"

Steam from dinner in restaurant forms dollar sign