Digitalisation Gifts

'Oh no...not here too!'

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

The Computer Bore

Online form - Submit.

'I've decided to centralize my operations. Everything will be in my ipad.'

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

"Would you relax? They never look up."

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

"Textin’"

I.T. Fear

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

Graduates on their phones

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"There, all neat and tidy!"

"We do all those old tricks electronically now."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

"Yes, you were born into the era of passwords and user-names. . . why do you ask, Mycat_2014?"

"It says here that if you read stuff on an electronic device you can miss the big picture."

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."

"I neeeeeeed neeeeeeed neeeeeeed my iPhone!"

"You may now kiss the bride."

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

'Who said romance is dead? I just downloaded a screensaver with red roses and chocolates for your PC!'

Technology and literature

"I've got a better view on my smart phone."

"Hack back with all you've got!"

"Wow, these e-readers take forever to burn..."

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"