Digital Security Savant Pillows

'How can he remember 37 passwords but always forget to pick his clothes up off the floor?'

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

Where was I?

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

'Can I download that as a PDF?'

"The new computer is great, but we can't get rid of the old one. It knows too much."

Latest Greatest Fastest Computer...versus Good Enough.

'Since PRISM, nothing is 'off the record' any more.'

'He's a media consultant. He came with the multimedia software package.'

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

Bob soon began to hate his new anti-spam software.

'Computers' 'Hardware' 'Software'

A Court Reporter's Pocket Knife

"You kids are losing your ability to communicate person-to-person...so we're having a good old-fashioned family talk!"

"Just sign it, or I'll post YOUR old report cards on social media."

"If we had invented the phone and computer, we would be at the top of the food chain. What a blown opportunity."

"I recently upgraded my resume-writing software."

Taking to the sky...

'I have your MRI results. Half your brain is clogged with passwords and the other half is clogged with user names.'

'You can't beat the old style security systems!'

Snake Blogging,

"Sorry I'm late. I forgot the PIN number I need to get my brain going."

'Oh my god! We've been the victims of cyber crime. . . someone on the other side of the world has paid all our bills.'

"If there's a way in, they'll find it."

"My cat just gave me the greatest password! She walked across my keyboard."

'We in the intelligence community have got to start ta.........I've already said too much.'

"You think they all look like security risks."

"You haven't seen security till you've seen it on the iPad 2."