Digital Remaster Gifts

'My new boss expects me to touch-type, a skill I'll have to digitally remaster.'

Mozart on a computer,

Connected to Technology.

"It's not just him. The whole system's down."

"Now the geeks hold all the power. They're the ones who know how to forge a parent's e-signature."

"I've edited your Wikipedia entry again, Sadie. You're about to be inundated with phone calls from the press." "Whatever, geek-boy." "You're now the world's foremost authority on Turkey leprosy, the disease that's threatening to ruin the holidays." "No one'll believe that." "Oh yeah? I wrote a Wikipedia page for Turkey leprosy, too, along with examples of all the historical figures it's killed, such as the Archduke of Crushistan." "There is no 'Crushistan.'" "I've written a Wikipedia entry for C

Back in my day, we were drawn with ink on paper, not on some fancy digital pad, but at least we knew we existed.

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"You'll be able to talk to your husband. I have video conferencing."

'It's my new fortune e-reader.'

'I got one of those new crystal ball smart watches.'

'What's the use? Everyone has his own PC future-probability program these days.'

'We have developed an APP we use to import ingredients from the Internet, merge them in the computer, and then download them into the distiller and then just bottle the output.'

"Where should we target our advertising dollars? "Hold on, I'm checking my website."

Unsocial Networking.

'I have a twitter account to slag off my facebook friends and I use facebook to insult my followers on twitter.'

'My son is studying communications in college. He never writes, calls, texts, or emails his parents.'

End of world nigh!!!

"My dad said I couldn't scare him, so I'm hiding all his data like it was erased. Get ready for a loud scream."

'I took the liberty of digitally enhancing my resume to make a mountain out of a mole hill.'

computer trick with teapot and cup

Requiem

"For heaven's sake, son...go out and MIX!"

You know that symphony I wrote in GarageBand? It drops next week. You're invited. Symphonies don't "drop," little buddy. Rock albums "drop." R&B "drops." Symphonies "debut." And they usually debut in concert halls, with live musicians. Where's your symphony debuting? Anybody-can-upload-anything-for-people-to-download.com. I wonder if I can get my tux pressed in time.

Fortune teller using a computer rather than traditional methods

"I'm the boss, I set the agenda, I make the decisions...GOT IT!"

"That's your granddad - amazing what they can do with filters these days."

Godot finally turns up

Plugged In

"My smarthome just sent me a text saying it's a mess, so it doesn't feel like having visitors right now."

"Wow, thanks. I'm a big fan. I've downloaded all your stuff."

Composer.

'Gerry's downloading a personality.'

'Management is upgrading all the hardware.'

'I only do biometric readings now.'