Digital Psychologist Gifts

I'm just dying to try out this new Rorschach app! ?

Computer help.

Computer Diagnosis Man.

The Googler

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

"..Your analysis and medication would be perfect if you were a goat."

"We no longer have to hide. Bigfoot hunters now only search for us online. It's going to be lonely around here."

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

'This app is linked to my financial advisor and provides stimulated hand-holding when the market is down.'

"If you prayed to Google instead of God, you might get a constructive response."

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

"Google gets thousands of requests each day to erase links. Most of them seem to go back to my website."

Kevin had a computer virus.

'What does the internet have against my people?'

"The answers to the questions you seek could also be found on Google."

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

"Siri, are Charlie’s parents to blame for his neurosis?"

'It's a book, Sweetie - it doesn't have any ram!'

The Thinker (with a laptop).

After the summer holidays

Digito Ergo Sum.

"I don't need therapy, but I'm concerned about my avatar. He's pretty screwed up."

Information Macht Frei

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

"Alexa, does this guy have mother issues?"

Psychology Clinic. Most potent example of solipsism I've ever seen --- he follows himself on Twitter.

"With all the AI and deep fake technology, I'm not even sure what's real anymore."

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

"When I was a kid there was no internet. If you wanted to bully someone, you had to do it to their face."