Digital Holiday Fans Pillows

"Christmas is cancelled."

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

"Yes, we voted remain - how did you guess?"

"Anything but milk and cookies."

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

"There's gotta be a way to make money off this."

Santa's wash day.

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

"Hi, my name is Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "And I have a drinking problem." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph."

Phil gets a head start on his holiday decorating.

'Happens every year - I can never remember where I put the tree decorations.'

Rudolph's off-season side hustle

"I hacked into Santa's computer and discovered we're not on his naughty list. I feel we're letting our generation down."

Accept cookies?

Father Christmas stuck on plane wing

"Well I don't know how they fly when I can't!"

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

"I love Boxing Day"

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

Rudolph's after-Christmas job

"Our lawyers are adept at spotting dodgy clauses.."

"It suddenly occurred to me - what was all this giving, giving, giving all the time?! How about doing some taking for a change?"

'I'm not allowed in the water until I can swim.'

'I'm glad that's over! After the last six weeks in the store, I'm never gonna have any kids!'

"Just a reminder, Santa. Don't forget to yule log off when you're done."

It's a girl!

'Hear you're big in logistics.'

Santa gets a ticket