Digital Gourmand Gifts

"May I suggest a wine and a filter setting?"

"Before I serve seconds I'd like everyone to take out their phones and complete a short survey rating Barbara's fig-nut stuffing."

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

"Fresh pepper?"

'Our special of the day is spam sandwiches.'

"No, no … the sashimi is fine. But I’m not crazy about your Wi-Fi signal."

A London gent abroad

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

Gone out...here is a computer simulation of your dinner

Internet Restaurant

Microwave confusion.

"I'm not eating a TV dinner. Now it's called 'Computer Cuisine.'"

"I am your bot server. Page me by phone and tip me in bitcoins."

"I wonder how many Facebook likes I'll get."

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

"How am I supposed to cook? The internet is down."

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

"The food was terrible, but my wife said it photographed well."

"Our specials can also be accessed at www.todaysspecials.com."

"Your dinner is at www.Icouldntbearsed.com."

'Thanksgiving dinner will be ready some time in February.'

Why Chemists shouldn't take their work home "I can't believe it's not b-b-vegetable mono & dyglycerides!"

'Now you can surf and turf.'

"I don't care how much I own – there's still something unsatisfying about digital Girl Scout Thin Mints."

"I think we need one that shows the oldest food in the country."

'I downloaded these recipes. Care to try virtual meatloaf?'

"At this time, if everyone would please switch their palates to airplane mode."

"I found out something last night that just totally destroyed my worldview."

Cook and PC

"You will have to text your order directly to chef. We're not speaking."

Waiter, there's a wireless earbud phone in my soup.