Digital Firefighter T-Shirts

Computer Time Bomb.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"No Frodo, we are still many leagues from Mordor. This is from a wildfire by I-5 west of Bakersfield."

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

Woman escapes with cats.

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

'It was the little darling's first time sitting up at the dining table!'

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

'I said 'Shall I put the cat out?''

'Strong curry for two and a fire-extinguisher.'

'In case of fire, don't panic, pay your bill then run like hell.'

"I came as soon as I got the message!"

The New Normal

"Oh we're fine, my husbands just learning to cook during the quarantine."

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

"He excels at putting out fires."

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

'Who said romance is dead? I just downloaded a screensaver with red roses and chocolates for your PC!'

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

S.S.dot.com

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

"Wow, these e-readers take forever to burn..."

"These are the environmentalists who set the Amazon forest on fire!"

"I've got a better view on my smart phone."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

Buddy hadn't learned from the time his tongue got stuck.

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

Fire hydrant with regular or sparkling water

'If I don't use the charcoal grill, I get a carbon offset and the fire department gets a day off.'

Fire door.