Digital Education Advocate Pillows

'Relax, dad, I haven't been in a classroom for months because all my college classes are online!'

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

"How can I be a lead learner without the technology needed to lead?"

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

"No, Einstein's theory of relativity isn't, 'don't marry your cousin.'"

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

"You have been specially selected to upload your bank details. Offer ends midnight."

'Boy or girl, straight or gay - I don't care as long as it's science-literate and non-republican.'

"So did you do all your leadership training online?"

'I'm enrolling in an online course to learn how to apply for a loan for an online university.'

"Why do I bother to evangelize online when no one listens?"

We only asked him to switch off his mobile and he seems to have shut down completely,

"Nice! Home school education has certainly changed since I was in school."

'I need ur homework ASAP!'

"Students only know the three Rs in context of the tree Ts: texts, tweets and tumblr."

''Increase education funding'? -- You want the people to get SMART?'

"My mommy's passwords are stronger than your mommy's passwords."

"There's nothing to be scared of, Mrs. Miller, it's just another teaching tool!"

"O.K. Kindergarten friends, let's sing together... 'If you're happy and you know it - and you've washed your hands for at least 20 seconds and you've squirted some sanitizer on them - clap your hands.'"

"I feel like you're limiting me to correct answers."

'Teacher layoffs adverted.'

"Let's see...I believe a computer will be available for your class six weeks from Friday between ten and eleven in the morning."

"It might be easier for me to follow if you could animate the fractions."

"I liked 'class dismissed' better than 'please log off and exit'."

"Why am I being trained on obsolete equipment?"

'Please excuse Harold for not having his homework. His internet service provider's servers were down and he couldn't connect to his online homework helpline.'

"Before we have our Maths lesson, a word from our sponsor"

www.canyoudomyhomeworkforme.com

Long queue for teacher recrutiment.'They're all bankers'

"Now don't forget to go on social media and rate today's lesson plan."

"I don't know why we need a qr code when all they have on the menu is dog food."