Digital Diversionist Pillows

"I virtually finished my homework."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

Screen Time vs Book Time

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

"Now the geeks hold all the power. They're the ones who know how to forge a parent's e-signature."

"I've edited your Wikipedia entry again, Sadie. You're about to be inundated with phone calls from the press." "Whatever, geek-boy." "You're now the world's foremost authority on Turkey leprosy, the disease that's threatening to ruin the holidays." "No one'll believe that." "Oh yeah? I wrote a Wikipedia page for Turkey leprosy, too, along with examples of all the historical figures it's killed, such as the Archduke of Crushistan." "There is no 'Crushistan.'" "I've written a Wikipedia entry for C

"You think you have problems? My entire wing command was just destroyed."

"DID YOU SEND THIS?"

A group of people in an art gallery staring at a phone

"My dad said I couldn't scare him, so I'm hiding all his data like it was erased. Get ready for a loud scream."

"I'm just saying, if you had to turn off the TV, would you still remember how?"

"I reached Level Three of Super Mario Brothers!"

'I took the liberty of digitally enhancing my resume to make a mountain out of a mole hill.'

computer trick with teapot and cup

"That's your granddad - amazing what they can do with filters these days."

'Will this job requirer me to look up from my phone?'

"My computer doesn't understand me!"

Diving Judge: Sorry, I Was Looking At My Phone.

"This is my son, Barry. He was headed for Congress, but instead had made his mark as a prominent internet troll."

Family separated by the Internet

'Let's tweet that there's civil unrest in Torquay and see if it gets reported on the news.'

Are you calling 911?!

'I steal from the rich databases and give to the poor databases.'

Clown receives 'hee hee mail'.

"An example of my game cheat skills is that I hacked into your computer and invited myself to this games tester interview."

"No, I'm not going to work. I sent my computer to work for me. The screen has a photo of my face, so people will think it's me."

Shooting the Messenger

Dog poos in .com

"I am doing my homework, but it's hard not to get distracted in this click-bait media environment."

"This is getting serious! He's asked me if I'd like to troll the internet with him tonight."

'I'm busy flinging birds at pigs, go away.'

Power theft on mobile phones

"I thought you were supposed to be user-friendly!"

Facebook - You have 17 requests to get on with your work.

Computer hackers' club - 'gone phishing'.