Digital Dilemma Debater Gifts

"None of this seems to be doing me any good at all!"

"It's no secret that rural broadband coverage is a scandal. Everyone knows that it's holding back development and it's a nightmare for locals."

"The Cloud ate my homework ... "

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

"We don't talk anymore."

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

'We're beta testing Goo-Goo Glass.'

The Eternal Question

What'r We Doing Today, Daddy?

"They say it's the first sign of aging - not being able to keep up with new technology."

The First Asshole

'Technology hates me.'

Social network site runs into trouble.

'We need a memory upgrade ourselves to remember all these passwords.'

Social media and privacy

Computers. Tablets. Laptops. The model is entirely voice-activated. I've always wanted to tell a computer "off."

'Doing this with his e-mails made more impact than sending them.'

'When I was young we didn't have the interweb at our fingertips. . . we had to go to the library to get our questions answered!'

"I'm just saying you're not allowed to use your phone during class. You're not being de-platformed."

'Darling you'll be so proud of me, I've just written my first email. Now I must rush to get it in the post.'

Modern Nursery Rhymes

'You get one more try at logging in - After that, you have to all start all over with a whole new computer.'

'Doctor, I just can't seem to relate to my computer equipment these days.'

Mousetrap has captured the wrong type of mouse.

"If your computer crashes alone in a forest, and no one complains, does IT respond?"

"Hold on, the puck is coming this way."

"My computer doesn't understand me!"

"No you can' 'google' number seven!"

Jesus forgets to save.

"The account number you entered on your keypad is incorrect. Your phone will self destruct in minus ten seconds."

My dog ate my flash drive, and that's where I stored my homework.

"Of course you're not a failure - lots of people don't know how to tweet."

"The first adult decision he's had to make is choosing between driving and texting.

"I have a real love/hate relationship with email."

"You've got mail! Also, Time, CNN, HBO, ICQ, Warner Bros, Netscape, Sports Illustrated. . . . ."