Digital Data Master Gifts

The Miracle Worker

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

"My Gmail account is full. I can't get any more email." "So?" "I'll miss email. It was so old-timey. You could write hundreds or even thousands of words, with actual paragraphs." "People didn't see any little animations to show them you were typing. They had to actually wonder if you were going to reply." "And the spam was fun. You never got to hear from Nigerian princes while you're checking your texts." "Just delete stuff." "If you delete a few gigs of old emails, you'll be able to get n

Today's love

'...and what's more, my databank has more data than your databank.'

'I hate playing stinkbugs! Every time we press them on defense, they just let 'e rip!'

Sign pointing to 'hindsight' and 'foresight'

"Can you tell me the story again about how you swiped right on Dad?"

Online Dating for Dummies

"I don't know which needs charged more, him or all the devices he was on all summer."

"You new personality that you downloaded off the Internet makes you irresistible."

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'Decision time. Which bridge to cross and which to burn.'

"A workshop will be offered on the topic of decision-making....I could possibly take part....o the other hand...."

'We were matched by computer.'

"Love me, Tinder; love me, do. . ."

National Archives

"He who controls the Internet controls the world."

"The job stress was already bad enough, but now I have to choose between 56 flavors of coffee."

You know that symphony I wrote in GarageBand? It drops next week. You're invited. Symphonies don't "drop," little buddy. Rock albums "drop." R&B "drops." Symphonies "debut." And they usually debut in concert halls, with live musicians. Where's your symphony debuting? Anybody-can-upload-anything-for-people-to-download.com. I wonder if I can get my tux pressed in time.

'I have here a list of websites you failed to delete from your hard drive...'

Love at first text.

"Oh dear, it seems your file has been routinely destroyed."

"Now I'd like to introduce the rest of my band. Give it up for my laptop!"

"Sometimes a spirit will linger in this world if it has emails it needs to reply to."

Computer He-male (email).

"It's been a perfectly wonderful date...let's not spoil it by talking to each other."

Love in social networks

The Artist Share of the Golden Goose Internet

Shoot.

"It's our third date, can we look at each other now?"

Medical Data Base of Useful Information, 5K. Medical Data base of useless information, 500,000,000 MB.

"Turns out Mommy's life is one big long report, sweeitie."

Conducting a blue bird.