Digital Content Gifts

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

'There's nothing on.'

"How long have you been watching a dog chasing his tail?"

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

"I can't wait to post this."

What passes today for 'nose in a book'.

"Don't Look At it! It's A Listicle!"

"Did you ever wonder who's really raising our kids?"

Hate Platforms

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

"Technology isn't making me smarter. It's allowing me to be dumb, faster."

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

'Homepage Sweet Homepage'

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

'Bring out yer books!'

Digital Fomo!

Weird things I do because of the internet

Daredevil on pc when doing stunt.

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

Cellphone Islands

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."