Digital Chatter Enthusiast Gifts

'The reason I never finish my homework is that I spend too much time tweeting about how I have too much homework.'

The Computer Bore

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

Woman on the phone.

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

IT staffer vacation tan lines.

'Honey, tell me honestly...does this operating system make me look big-endian?'

"Sure, this camp has swimming, games, fishing, horseback riding and rock climbing. But, does it have Wi-Fi?"

"At least their bull sessions are green. Everything they say is 100% biodegradable."

Boys and Girls: Differences in Internet Surfing.

"I think I might go outside. My fresh air app is glitchy today."

'Who's a pretty boy! Is that all you've got to say?'

"So, what do you think about the web developer course you are taking?"

'And by clicking on 'I Agree,' you agree to the terms and conditions...'

Newborn Uses Smartphone To Send His Dad A Text Message.

"You're all hashtag summarily dismissed."

"Our problem is we upgraded everything in the new version except the hype."

Man with 'low memory' on his phone and his head

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

How to apply for a job, then vs. now

Social Notworking

"Someone posted a picture of you working in the yard, so I knew right away it had to be a deepfake."

Actually, could you just e-mail me your electronic signature? Meet the author.

Sure, he can talk already, but it's all just psychobabble.

"Thanks for your offer, but in our company we still have a perfect information and communication system. It's called water cooler talk."

'I've finally achieved a paperless office.'

'And another confusing thing, they give you a ‘textbook,' but it has nothing to do with texting.'

'Oh look Julia, he's just text me his first word.'

Turn on chat. Delete conversation.

'I've decided to replace all human interaction with personal electronics.'

"Sorry, I don't really believe in being social offline."

"What are they saying about you on Yelp?"

'Today we learned if it ain't on Google, it ain't worth knowing.'