Digital Age Dilettante Pillows

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

'Can I call you back? I've got a dinner to go to.'

"Did you get my tweet?"

"Well - I've either bought a pack of table napkins, or adopted a Siberian tiger cub..."

'What we need is a decision, not more foot-dragging.'

"...I try to communicate with Desmond, but all he ever does is grunt."

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

"You've called tech-support so often that it was decided that it's more practical if I just come and live with you."

"Forget it - she's out of your league."

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

"I asked a designer to come in and give the office a needed pick-me-up...probably should have been a little more specific."

'You know me, I'm a problem solver. I listen. I flirt with understanding. I move on.'

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Turn around at the next junction, turn around now! Turn around immediately - you've forgotten your handbags!

"Do you mind if I not listen while you talk?"

"You told me to make a desktop shortcut, so I did. Just take the shortcut I made through the mess."

'I'm trying to figure out online shopping. I've found some pants I like, but I can't find a fitting room.'

'What superpower would I like? Normally, invisibility, but as I'm a 53 year old female, I feel that I've already been granted it.'

"Honest, D-D-Dad. My report card's 'in the cloud.'"

"Lost all track fo time with you. 93 unread messages!"

"It's called a mobile... but I've been here an hour and have yet to see it move."

"Dating advice from your old man? Ew, weird. Instead, let's ask Stinky Rick."

'Should I buy or sell?'

"Remember, I'm 'catch and release'."

'We've considered every potential risk except the risks of avoiding all risks.'

"I'd text you, but I haven't learnt to spell yet."

They used a scientific method to decide which new product idea to pursue.

I'm beginning to realize you can't cram 10 gigabytes of information into a one-gigabyte brain.

"Of course, you understand you can't possibly stay here tonight."

"I am in the moment - just not the moment you're in."

"The job stress was already bad enough, but now I have to choose between 56 flavors of coffee."

'Are you fit, attractive male...?'

Rusty and Molly's first date was going beautifully until the 'car tyre incident.