Dieting Tactician Gifts

'Pastry sniffing canine corporation' entering a 'Diet clinic dormitory'.

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

In the Guru District

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

What the Doctor Ordered

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

Raw food, after you leave for work.

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

Bad for you but to die for

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"Winter is coming, and there will be months without much sunshine, so it's important that you take your vitamin D supplement Darling..."

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

Studies show foods work miracles!

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

"That's it young man. . . No more energy drinks for you!"

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

The eco club is starting a locavore movement here at school. "Loco" what? Eating fresh food, grown locally. So? So everyone eats healthier and uses less energy. Um � Ok. I'll tell my mom. Who are those people. Locobores.

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

Even good cholesterol can develop an unhealthy sports addiction...

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

The Gospel According To Jane Brody"Orange, come in. Apple, come in. Hey you, frankfurter, hold it right there."

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'