Dieting Debugger Pillows

'Let me at it! Let me see!!'

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'Like death by salad.'

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

Secretive Weigh In.

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

"That's it young man. . . No more energy drinks for you!"

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

Critisize your weight.

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'This towel is wet so I'll subtract fourteen pounds.'

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

Woman Weighing Herself on Two Scales.

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

'Diet considerations.'

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

"I'm not sure what's causing your stomachache. But I think it's safe to rule out hunger pains."

'I'm putting you on a 'whatever tastes good, don't eat it' diet.'

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

"I've tried 5 diets and haven't lost a pound. Maybe I shouldn't try them all at the same time."

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

'Come on, eat your spinach.' -' Sorry, I'm on a special diet...No toxic waste.'

"...there, I found it. Stellar! I love this nutrition app!"

Attack of the 'health' foods

Mind, Body, Spirit (and Food Court).

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

"Frankly, dear, I think you've been on this paleo diet much too long!"

"I can't have anything that's a food."

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'