Dieting Challenger Gifts

'I reduce my stress with comfort food. Now none of my clothes are comfortable.'

'Well, this is a first †he's got repetitive motion syndrome from eating!'

'I got him for self defense. Boze eats my wife's leftovers.'

As soon as the diet ends the lost weight returns.

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Tension filled the tent.

Too much cilantro

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

"I want to set the world record for eating the most empanadas ever!"

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

"It'll never be ready in time."

Joe's Weight Gain: 'Hey, Victoria...I like this diet you told me about yesterday...I just lost 2 more while we've been talking.'

"Ack! This stuff's hard to eat!"

"Cut down on the Ho-Ho's."

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

"I don't think there's anything wrong with your fitness watch: It's just that you haven't moved enough to trigger it..."

'What we were about to receive has gone the way of all flesh.'

It took a while but Henk finally did lose his Christmas bum.

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

'I intend to stay as CEO of this organisation come hell or high cholesterol.'

"There's a free pudding for whoever finds the Chef's glass eye."

'If you don't plan on snacking in between meals, then why did move the fridge in here?'

'What's with my cholesterol problem, Doc - all I eat is grass and grain!'

"When are you going to make the sort of bread my mother makes?"

"Touch that and you're a dead man."

'Don't be tempted, Mrs. Root, just mail those apple fritters right here to me!'

'The other foot also Mrs Zipsky!'

'It's the half-empty bag of cookies from the back of the pantry. Should I tell them you'll call back?'

'I want to lose weight, Doctor.' - 'Eat less, then.' - 'I need it to be more complicated than that.' - 'Why?' - 'How can I justify failing if it's that simple, eh?!' - 'Gah. He's breaking me...' -

'I am a staving artist. I'm fat because all I can afford is junk food!'

"I was just... uh... looking for the low-fat yogurt."

"'A land of milk and honey'? - But I'm on a DIET!"

'I'd like to see him do that with your cooking...'

'I know you are doing your best, but it will be great when Pat comes home.'