Diet Dilemma Haver Gifts

'Your blood pressure is extremely high - your resistance to things that cause it, extremely low!'

'Perhaps sir would like the dessert menu?'

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

"Statins. I got statins. Who needs statins?"

"I'm retaining doughnuts."

Vegetarian Nightmare.

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

The nutritional devils and angels on your shoulder.

'Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.'

'The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it!'

'Excellent napkin.'

"Why don't we skip the falafel bar, Sinbad."

Roger couldn't understand why his diet wasn't working.

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"

'Chocolate covered raisins, chocolate covered strawberries...is not what I mean when I said that fruit is healthy for you.'

It was time to start the lockdown diet.

"A minute on the lips"

Fast food trap.

"Just Desserts" and "Unjust Desserts"

'You were right, doc. Blood is thicker than water.'

"Does skipping breakfast count as both exercise and dieting?"

"No thanks, mom. I'm on a vegetable free diet."

Need to block those Cookies Santa!

"I work out so I don't have to eat kale."

"The diet section is located next to the snack bar."

'well, then, I guess you're also lactose substitute intolerant.'

"If you don't plan on snacking at night, then why did you move the refrigerator in here?"

Advent fridge

"Every time I go on a diet, he brings up the land of milk and honey."

Innovate - man boobs and gut bra.

"It's not that you've chosen the wrong diet, it's just that you're not meant to eat them all at once!"

"Our menu is divided into three sections... low carb, low sodium and WTF!"

"Do you have such a thing as low calorie caramel coffee creams?"

"It's OK, I'm on a meat day."

'Gorgeous or gorging, why do I always have to choose?'