Dialects Mugs

'Aye up. . . I've has an Ebygum mail.'

'I think she said, when does the Newcastle flight leave.'

Scouse For Beginners

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

Cockney language book

"Once I'm away from Maine, I stop saying ay-yah."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"You're fired."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

Campaign for Plain English

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

Thru versus Through Traffic

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

Backfire

Punctuation Police

Assault 'n' Vinegar

A Copy Editor and His Dog

What's normal?

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

Lesser known greek gods,

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

'The Questioner'

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

Wok. Don't Wok.

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."