Devoted Spouse Pillows

"Some people say you can't put a price on a wife's twenty-seven years of loyalty and devotion. They're wrong."

'But you know I don't have brand loyalty for anyone but you!'

This next song goes out to the girl who stole my heart and my guitar.

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

"Seminary didn't prepare me for this."

You're the olive in my martini

Unconditional Loveseat

Behind Every Stupid Man

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice a favourite, and entrusted by his master.

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

Valentines

Work Life Balance

"I want to quit, spend more time with my family, finish grade 3....."

"It's childhood. Your child has childhood."

"'Best wishes'? That's it? That's all you got?!"

I am your BIGGEST fan!

'His wife is very supportive.'

Scared husband needs to have scans done in children's exam room.

"Seminary didn't prepare me for this."

'Swear on your unpublished novels that you will support each other's ridiculous dreams.'

'Sorry. Your accident insurance doesn't cover that kind of incident.'

"My parents are members of a tiny cult that worships me."

Sir Edmund Hillary Arriving Home To His Third Floor Apartment

"Visiting hours are over, Mrs. Glenborn."

The Pope's bags getting carried by an angel.

"Ten commandments and the periodic table – all we have to know."

"Michael, were you listening? Same question."

'Now that's devotion. Two broken arms and still working.'

I work too hard, I need a change, more time to spend with the children...by the way how many have we got?

Snowman about melting snowman: 'Just once I'd like to meet someone who isn't a fair weather friend.'

"I like being a kid - it's the ultimate entitlement program."

Zeal.

Without you I'm Blue.

Mother's Day

"I find it difficult to like him. He's too good at being humble."