Development Manager Gifts

R&D - Relax & Doodle

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"Nation-building never works."

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

The Computer Bore

"They grow up so fast."

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"Hmmm ... that's interesting. Now, what about ideas that don't suck - do you have any of those?"

Guy has framed 'first Yuan'

Cut Price

Create some buzz!

"I bet you're curious about what's going on in the R&D Department."

The Rubber Ball Company

'Don't worry. No one else knows what they are doing either.'

Back to work...

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

Bullseye!

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

'Now then - I just wanted to see how you handle pressure, Mr. Boyle.'

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

"My best managerial trait is that I dig for answers until I get them between my teeth. My worst trait is that sometimes I bury them."

Friday

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

Woman holds report: 'This has so many different fonts in it, I thougt it was a ransom note.'