Detergent Developer Pillows

'Do you realize that this is the sixth 'new and improved version' of our detergent and now we're back to our original formulation?'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

The Computer Bore

"They grow up so fast."

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

"I bet you're curious about what's going on in the R&D Department."

'We manufacture micro computing circuits. We're looking to hire someone who can anticipate the next small thing.'

Bright idea

Back to work...

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

Friday

"What if, instead of the safe being filled with rawhide, it's filled with catnip and mice!" "No one will buy it." "Drugs and rodents? Who's our demographic?" "The Simpsons already did that."

GPC needs to make its new formula foolproof.

"It's me. I'm calling in sick of it."

"That new drug causes flatulence."

'Does it bother anyone else that our entire business is based on one questionable product?'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

"I need a simple fix. No one asked you to reinvent the wheel."

"I know R&D feels that the product warrants at least two 'really'."

"What these product ideas lack is a little bite."

"Are we overthinking this?"

'The boss said to get rid of all the pirated software before he returns, which will be in about five to ten years.'

Engineer on the move.

Food manufacturing industry in a soup.

"Yes, they come out white than white, but when they went in they were blue."

"How about this? We carpet the road and use the resultant static electricity to power our electric cars."

The Ordered List

"Not bad, but it has a sort of plastic aftertaste."

'Now, for the hyperactive, we've come up with a lethargy drink.'

'I know what we need to turn this around, a mindless product that will make money fly out of peoples pocketbooks!'

"I'm afraid you neglected to submit the proper development permit application."

'It has everything... I love it!'

"36% of our focus group suffered from the side effects, while 14% enjoyed them."