Desperation Dodgers Gifts

'Please take this flyer.'

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

'Today is the tomorrow I feared yesterday. . .'

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

Self-Help Books Families for Lockdown

Examinations.

'I dont know about you, but I've got the feeling we're in for long flight delays...'

"I don't know what I'm going to do...my presentation is due on Monday and I haven't even started...I'm not sure I know how to speak."

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

The game is tied, and this is the final inning because the sun is setting. I understand, coach, I need to get home before dark!

"So, who would you like me to call first, dear, the plumber or the exterminator?"

Executive Asks Death To Wait

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

The four housemen of procrastination

A deadline comes to chew up a worker.

The Graveyard of Past Deadlines

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

"I know it's not in our nature, but we really gotta stop charging everything."

Hear me, Graduates!

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

Financial Advisor. The next time you let your inner child out to play, don't let him play with your credit cards.

'What do you mean we can't finish on time? Do you want history to say that Rome wasn't built in a day?'

",,,and what's more Pearson, it hasn�t gone unnoticed that you're not meeting deadlines"

"Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember . . ."

IRS. April 15th is the deadlie for filing your return, not a "best if used by" date.

Kicking The Habit

It's an I-O-Ewe.

'So, who's first?'

'It will take all my nine lives to pay off my student loans.'

Deadlines, kill fees. Who comes up with these terms?

"What's ticking away in your filing system?"