Design Flaw Fixer T-Shirts

Lotion-bottle manufacturer's meeting

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

Waiting for Pants

Forgot your locker combination? Let Sammy the weasel pick it open for you!

Not all service desk staff were pleased about the new bring your own device policy

Early design for the Two-Man Kayak.

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

System failure - calling for sysadmin...

Man at council planning offices can't get through door due to position of steps.

Son? We need to talk about inappropriate life choices. I was joking. I'm not going to be an investment banker. Great! I'd hate to see you waste your talents. There are plenty of other jobs. Like the fixer who disappears famous athletes' awkward e-mails. You'll always be employed.

Development of disgusting new flaws. Loving acceptance of your flaws.

It's too hard to clean my closet. Take out everything. Throw them into "keep", "donate" or "toss" boxes. Ok. Done!

Cyber disease.

'Agreed then? Your boy takes a dive in the fifth...'

"We will indeed be facing numerous enraged customers."

Setbacks in the development of the rubber mallet.

'Try rebooting.'

'Is the drain still clogged, Henry?'

"Have you tried switching it off and switching it back on again - or pretending there's absolutely nothing wrong with it?"

"Make it flimsier and even more infuriating."

"I had to improvise"

'Is it true the building's sinking?'

'If we happen to experience deja vu, let's make sure we do some things differently.'

'Maybe you could get dressed faster if you lost that speed bump around your waist.'

"I told you we should have gotten the ‘up’ stairs."

"Darling - I can't seem to find the invisible menders..."

'I guess it's official now. No one in this town actually makes anything anymore.'

Boy with his finger in a leaking water bed.

"This new phone you've designed...it doesn't make calls!"

'That's one way to 'shut down' the system...'

"If you want proof that your email is working again, then you can read all the spam you just received."

"If you want to turn it off, you just pull this chain until you accidentally turn it back on."

Boss, someone called The Fixer is here to see you. Excellent. Go out and tell him I want him to teach you everything he knows. I don't see why I should have to keep paying him when I've got my very own minion. Pay extra attention to the issue vague threats to shut down lawsuits part. If he asks why I didn't fire him myself, you tell him I've moved to Botswana. Very bad man.

Tailor Shop. Repairs. Alterations. You're a tailor who fixes torn pants?! When we met in the bar you said you were a genetic engineer! No, I said I do "jean splicing"!