Desert Island Survivor Gifts

"Breakfast's ready, darling."

'Eating all of this coconut is making me feel really horny.'

'What luck! Just the allergist I was going to refer you to.'

'You'll ruin that palm if you keep on!'

"I always wondered if learning to tie knots in the Brownies would ever come in useful."

"I bet you thought that because you'd been castaway for forty years, you'd get off with your six month prison sentence."

"So, the Scharfs have an atoll. Big deal."

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

'I blame global warming!'

"I don't know if I can do 'Gilmore Girls' today. I'm not sure I'm feeling up for anything involving witty yet poignant repartee."

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

Saved...life is good!

"Yes, I'm alone."

Just a little seasoning...

Public footpath on a desert island.

"Any ideas? I'm terrible with cursive writing."

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

"That's 'Help' with an 'H'."

Santa Claus delivers present to man stranded on desert island.

Ed is upset because he didn't get the promotion he had promised himself.

'I forgot to cancel the milk!'

"Is it just me, right, is it just me ...?"

Emergency Pants

Best friends without borders.

"It's from the Facebook company. They're buying out every messaging platform."

Shipwrecked Ventriloquist.

"I'm starting up a concierge medicine practice. You in?"

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

'Lookout, here comes another boatload of cartoonists.'

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

Castaway on a desert island with one tree finds a hammock.

'If you ask me the time again, I'll punch you!'

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, so we build a boat or a tiki bar?"