Demonology Hobbyist Pillows

Orientation: Welcome to Hell

Meowlzebub

"I must have pressed the wrong button."

'What really annoys me is that they're not even my demons - they're Goya's and Hieronymus Bosch's and Brueghel's.'

I demand to see a lawyer. May I say, you've come to the right place.

"Can I see that 'National Law Journal' when you're through with it?"

I'm sorry, Dick. I think we should start seeing other demons.

"Oh no! - we forgot to pay the exorcist... we've been repossessed!!"

Hellbillies.

"Running out for lawyers and CEOs. Want anything?"

"Sorry, there's no toilet paper or hand sanitizer down here."

Descartes's Demon

'Wrong fork. Good Lord, man, don't you have any table manners?'

'It was a split decision.'

"Yes, I have worked with Donald Trump's hair."

"My name's Karezog, Despoiler of Worlds, Devourer of Souls. I'll be your server tonight."

Dave began to suspect that he had moved next door to the neighbour from hell.

"Dad, do you believe in God?"

'Get me Hell, Miss Saunders. I wish to sell my soul.'

"Department of infernal affairs. How may I misdirect your employee pension plan?"

"Hey - are those scented candles???"

'At least it's a dry heat'

"Oh, by the way, as you were on your way down here your lottery ticket won seventeen million dollars."

Human Resources and Inhuman Resources

Excercising demons

'Careful, this plate isn't hot.'

"Yeah but he wasn't just the devourer of souls, he also created lots of jobs!"

Angel

'Hey! Where's the fire?'

'Bad sport.'

"Ok, first the good news..."

'Don't answer the door. It's probably Charlie Sheen.'