Delay Warriors Gifts

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

Burning the midnight oil.

Working hours.

Pull an all-nighter?

"I think I see your deadline approaching."

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

Thank You For Not Asking If I's enjoying My First Vacation in 20 Years.

Quicksands of time

"My five least favorite words in the world: By End of the Day Friday!"

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

"The doctor will see you in a week - if you could still be ill a week on Wednesday."

A spider meal prepping

"I wrote another five hundred words. Can I have another cookie?"

Tedium Tours.

' Oh God ! not Friday again ! what happened to Saturday...Sunday...Monday...Tuesday....? '

"I like Monday mornings...and Friday afternoons. But all that in-between stuff bums me out."

"It's remarkable, Mr. Volmer. You have the clothes of a man half your age!"

"I hope you don't think that music while I waited soothed me."

In case of stress break glass.

Procrastinators Anonymous: Just wait and see.

"Nothing ruins a Friday more than waking up and realizing it's only Thursday."

"... And you said this was you and your husband's first time shopping at Costco?"

Energy Drink - In case of deadline bust ass.

'You'll have to excuse her - being on hold with Disneyland Paris has sent her goofy...'

'It started with a headache, but not I've got a bedsore from sitting so long in this waiting room!'

10 items or less queue. (Woman has thrown eggs onto floor).

Dr. Godot's waiting room.

"Your appointment with the doctor is at eleven-fifteen, but his appointment with you is at twelve-fifteen."

Waiting and waiting and waiting room

"Does this come with a guarantee?"