Delay Survivor Gifts

Waiting and waiting and waiting room

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

Emergency Pants

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

"I'm starting up a concierge medicine practice. You in?"

"I don't know what's so funny. All I asked was whether this was their only flight today."

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

'He needs professional HELP!'

"Well, that's just great! I guess pigs don't fly after all!"

'We're in a hurry.'

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, so we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

'What luck!'

"We'll let you know when we find your luggage. Meanwhile, you qualified for our frequent lost luggage club."

A diet high in cholesterol can be dangerous to your health.

"Mr. Crusoe, you have some heft overdue fines."

"Is this the queue for Funworld?"

"I'm afraid there's just so far you can go with street smarts."

Stranded Techie Needs Batteries

Welcome centre

'What luck. It's Kosher.'

Deflating Island

"No, we're no gods, we're God's gift to women!"

'Your turn.'

"Well, my pension was tied up in the cruise liner industry."

Women castaways are joined on the island by ugly men.

'I'm switching to another provider,dear.'

"It's from, The Environmental Protection Agency. They're fining us for polluting the ocean with messages in plastic bottles!"

"It's too bad you're allergic to nuts."

Procrastinators Anonymous: Just wait and see.

'No offense, Frank, but your Facebook posts are getting repetitive.'