Defense Contractor Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Our $500- Pentagon toilet seats now made by Haliburton in Iraq for $800."

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Neo-International Law

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

Military Medals

"The first one is for graduating from basic training. The rest are classified."

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

"Weather like this plagued my retreat from Moscow."

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

Baby being fed using a lego construction.

'I've only come to get my nail back.'

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

Lost around a military base.

Family Salutes as Father Comes Home.

Kamikaze Colour

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

"That's my dad back when he was, like, militarized."

Building a company.

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

'My building inspector just doesn't understand me.'

"I can't imagine how things could get any worse."

'I think this is deep enough for the foundations!'

Engineer on the move.

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

'Guess they're still fixing the street.'

'Oh no. Another major code violation decision.'

'Uh oh. I can see another few hundred will be added to your bid.'

"Lemming Boot Camp"

The camouflage in vietnam was more comfortable

Vladimir Putin.

'I never saw a tracer bullet that I didn't admire for color, clarity and swiftness.'