Deep-sea Fun-seeker Gifts

"I told you not to hold your breath when comping up!"

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

"The boys at Jack's Bait & Tackle will never believe this one!"

Pirate eye test

The Final Selfie

'Little is known about these amazing creatures, as there have only been a few live sightings, by giant squid scientists. Despite previous beliefs, they are actually a land animal, as the fins and respiratory system are removable.'

Cast away in a life raft with Dr. Phil.

Two divers sword fighting under water with swordfish

Fisherman has his dinghy punctured by a swordfish.

"Like I know, dude...but this wave is so awesome!"

"You want real pressure?!! Try where I work."

"I see you've come prepared for an in-depth interview."

'Kiss me Hardy.'

Diver with metal detector thinks he has located treasure but he has located atomic waste.

'Have you been under much pressure lately, Mr. Verne?'

"Trust me, boss, he knows his pies...he just needs more retraining."

'I can't believe this! Is there anyone here who isn't too chicken to jump?'

Scientists find a giant plug in the ocean - 'I don't know what it means either, but for Pete's sake don't touch it!'

'My hubby's gone fishing, he'll be having a whale of a time.'

Scuba texting

"If you swim upside-down like this you can sneak up on prey easier since they can't see your fin. . ."

The groundhog, unable to see his shadow, goes in for a cataract operation.

"I want to explore the brutal and true civilisation, to explore lands on troubled by tourist boards, and if you could sort five-star accommodation and decent Wi-Fi that would be perfect."

So Lonely 'Twas (The Rime of the Ancient Mariner).

Mermaid luring pirates to their death

'Have you farted?'

"You usually don't see them so close to people who urinate in the water."

Atlantis, a case of a poor city water planning.

"Rats, we can't bow ride this one: it's a hovercraft..."

That Sinking Feeling

"Honestly, Edna, he just wasn't worth it!"

'Come back lads, it's 'armless.'

Scuba diver using beer rather than air.

"Heck of a fish, but I can see why your feelings would be pretty mixed right now."

It's always the one you least expect that turns on you.