Deep-sea Drinker Gifts

The 50-Bar.

Happy Hour

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

"Touché"

"Hard day at the office Dear? You're swigging the Balsamic Vinegar."

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

'Silent type, eh?'

'Little is known about these amazing creatures, as there have only been a few live sightings, by giant squid scientists. Despite previous beliefs, they are actually a land animal, as the fins and respiratory system are removable.'

Shark Chum

Two divers sword fighting under water with swordfish

"I told you not to hold your breath when comping up!"

"He's chasing the White Whale, as usual."

"It's like the other ones! I saw a shark! I saw a shark!"

"The perfect killing machine? Is that all I am to you?"

"I see you've come prepared for an in-depth interview."

The Devil's advocaat.

"What should we do today? Swim against the tide or go with the flow?"

Diver with metal detector thinks he has located treasure but he has located atomic waste.

'Have you been under much pressure lately, Mr. Verne?'

A patient, a doctor and a deep sea diver

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

'I've been under a lot of pressure.' (Diver on therapist's couch).

"And while you're waiting for your drinks can I get you something from the bar?"

Pearl Fishers

'Something tells me we're close!'

'How was your holiday? Go anywhere interesting?'

'Single or double?'

Scientists find a giant plug in the ocean - 'I don't know what it means either, but for Pete's sake don't touch it!'

'Oceanographers go home'

'My advice? Dump him! There are plenty more fish in the sea...'

"I live in dread of being mistaken for an undersea energy cable."