Deduction Diva Pillows

'Amazing, Holmes! You can deduce all that just by looking at me?'

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

'You the one who called Amnesty International?'

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

'Yeah, the radiology job market is really hot right now - it's so hot I think I'm getting third degree burns! I gotta go!'

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

"I thought you were out front telling the fence company how to do their job."

Sales - "For the last time, stop saving us money." (Colour)

Baby dressed for the opera.

The quarantine self cut.

'After years of studying the apes I've finally found a way of being accepted into their group.'

'Stop laughing - Have you never seen a girl putting her make-up on?'

How much would you take off for cash?

"I only need two tools: WD-40 if something doesn't move that should, and duct tape if something moves that shouldn't!"

"You're just in time for our 'post Christmas, pre Autumn alternate Tuesday in August late season Sale!'"

"How much is the sign?"

"We're getting somewhere now. This is the exact opposite of what I want."

Bargains

DIY pedicure

'I wonder how my husband is managing at the construction site with my gavel.'

"Say the whole prayer, none of this et cetera, et cetera..."

'You realize, of course, there's nothing wrong with me. . . I'm only here 'cause of your 50%-off-first-visit coupon and I am not a serial bargain shopaholic.'

'Teacher says I don't pay attention, I have no retention but I'm great at detention.'

The Knitwit...

"So with 50% sale discount, plus the 30% early bird reduction, a 10% bonus for paying in full and a $100 cash back... we owe you $1.75"

'I'd like to overwhelm them with instructional excellence, but I'm not above winning through intimidation.'