Dedicated Educator Gifts

'And if you ever doubt your solutions, simply refer to this formula.'

'I hope that is not too much of an inconvenience for you, but I'm desperate to hold on to good teachers.'

Express Lane: 10 or less quibbles about grades

"I knew there'd be pitfalls when I became a teacher, but thirty to a classroom is too many."

'I'm pretty sure I'm just seeing you due to bad eggnog, but still, as a principal I try to keep school costs down so I was wondering if you'd deliver these report cards while on your rounds?'

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

Burning the midnight oil.

"Work hard, make the sacrifices and in 25 years you could be just like me!"

'Inevitably, I come to work early, leave late and alienate everyone.'

I've given you 110 for ten years, like you asked. Now I'm taking that year off that I've earned!

'I solve so many work problems at home.'

'Are you just back from work or on your way to the office?'

"I'm doing all I can to make the little things count."

"I just want to go home, crawl into bed, and do some more work."

'What's my secret? I never left work last night.'

"Darren Eggleston. I saw that!"

Books on running a successful school,

'The good news is that all the teachers liked the weekend brainstorming retreat. The bad news is that twelve of them are out today with splitting headaches.'

'He has a weak character. Notice how easily he lets his work distract him?'

No room to hang his diploma.

"Any missed assignments can be excused only with a note from your internet service provider."

People of Courage

'As much time and effort as he puts into this job, you'd think there was some money in it.'

"Blood sweat and tears. I think it's supposed to make us feel guilty."

'While we appreciate company loyalty, Larson, you should really be in the hospital.'

"You go the extra mile for us, but in the wrong direction."

'I give all my new teachers the same advice. Never minimize the transformative power of a smile attached to your words.'

'Teacher says I don't pay attention, I have no retention but I'm great at detention.'

'Herbie dear, why can't you ever forget the office?!'

"Dad, I studied really hard! I stayed up till 1 in the morning."

'Most loyal employee in my department.'

"I was in the office an hour early this morning."

"There are thirty four children in my class...thirty one naughty, three nice."

'-and for fifty years undying loyalty to the company...'

'Your propensity for hard work is having a negative effect on the other employees, Simpkins!'