Decorating Diva Gifts

Extra Large Christmas Tree

"Didn't we have a door over there?"

"Can you stop bouncing your home improvement ideas off me!"

"Who needs a tree?"

"He might be moody, but he's the best in the city...and worth every penny!"

"I'll never understand wallpaper."

"I can't wait to put them on."

"I don't believe it! The shops are selling chirstmas decorations already."

Wife used husbands smelly sock to complete Christmas stocking display on mantle.

Warmer Weather.

What if Martha Stewart had been born a gopher?

"Could I have another quick look at your references, Barker?"

"Hubert, you know good and well that I said to deck the halls with boughs of holly!"

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

"Home depot."

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

'Come on, you can help me to choose some lovely wallpaper.'

A woman with a novel and poetry handbag.

Little Princess.

Framed Lady

"Could we be getting a little too museum-quality?"

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

"Memo to self - personalise new work-station."

Kensington Fluffies

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

Texturing the Walls

'Look Daddy: I'm wearing Mummy's shoes...'

'At least I never have to straighten it out.'

"It keeps it out of sight when we're not watching it."

"All your throw pillows were in knots."

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."