Decorated Hero Humor Pillows

"Take it easy - that one's attached to my nipple."

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

Still Life With Nordic Track

'Who said the Germans don't have a sense of humour? Just look at that card Hans Greber and we have haven't been shot at all day.'

"Wow, what are the chances of that four letter word being in your alphabet soup?"

Shaker furniture: The flamboyant years.

'My doctor tells me I have medal poisoning.'

Technical specifications: semi-automatic 1.2 mm cartoon launcher. 7.5 inch barrels holds a full stick of graphite. Fires rounds of sarcasm, satire and spoofs. Takes out religious fanatics with sharp wit.

"My name is Phil, and I, too, am..."

Paint. I can't decide between Blood of my Enemies and Candy Apple Red.

"Reproduction furniture."

'It's a good job I was trapped by my wooden leg and not my good one, son!'

'I must warn you, I'm an army boxer.'

Military Intelligence - Cross word puzzle instead of medal ribbons.

'Sorry general, but this is a four star restaurant.'

"Sorry I'm late for your birthday. I'm running a little behind."

"I thought you said there's nothing significant in the paper anymore..."

"...and this one is from my wife because I used two squirts of washing up liquid instead of three."

'This one's a hood ornament. I got it for carpooling.'

"You know they're just plastic, and I know they're just plastic, but take them down."

A sporting sort - clubs , hearts, diamonds and spades for medals

"Too Marvel?"

Supersonic comic: 'A funny thing happened on the way here...'

THE WILKINSON SWORD AND THE STONE

Natural bomb

"Actually, Eric, I said I'd like a horse brass stuck to the wall!"

'You constructed a beautiful work table. You're a talented woodworking legend in your own life.'

"I wanted a gazebo."

Cape

Supernova Man

A Series of Misadventures.

'And this one's for humor in the line of duty.'

'Fighting evil, fighting evil, fighting evil...oh, wait, how about the 17th, say noonish?'

"This is what happens when you have only one kevlar vest for the troops."