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Trends in Office Décor.

"Thanks, it's the ninth designer cushion I've shoplifted this week..."

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

"You're welcome."

"Pillows for sleeping on are downstairs. These are all for screaming into."

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

'You do realise that's pot pourii?'

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

Posh Easter Egg

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

Doulton Canada Geese

"Okay, lady, your new carpet is installed...you can let your dog back in now."

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

For the musician strapped for space...the Murphy piano.

King Madras

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

Pea green

This is the first time I've been on the top management floor.

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

"The board is going to have to talk to 5-G again."

"Yup, looks like your bookcase is full. You might want to start thinking about getting a new one."

'Yes,I did bag him from a treestand.How did you guess?'