Debt-related Humor Pillows

"Dad, the gorilla from the collecting agency is back!"

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

"Why yes, there was an extra five thousand dollars in my pay check last week...er...I thought it was a raise."

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

'All we can do is hope for identity theft.'

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

"Oh I have plenty of sex appeal. It's all here in my bank baalance."

"The company only made a profit of $2 billion. So that raise you requested will have to wait."

"Oh no! - we forgot to pay the exorcist... we've been repossessed!!"

'Well, son... I've made my first million by selling my unpaid bills to the paper-recycling guy!'

Repossessions

'This is the 'I Fell Behind On My Credit Card Payments, So They Took My Guitar Away Blues'. I'll be performing it a cappella.'

"I only invest in alternative meat products, so I reject the terms 'Bull' and 'Bear'."

"Love you, love us, and I'm comfortable with our debt level."

'How about a reverse-reverse mortgage? In a reverse-reverse mortgage, no one pays anyone anything, and no one seems to care.'

'I'm sorry, but without a significant deposit, we can't give you a mortgage.'

Borrowed 200K for mime school

Visit to the Bank Manager, "Marrying my daughter isn't the sort of security I had in mind, Harry!"

'He owes $30,000 for a degree in drama but right now he's not acting.'

In a Kitchen Cupboard, somewhere on Wall St...fortunes changed!!

'Oh he's my loans officer.'

'Since stocks are so wacko now,I'm advising clients to go with their lucky numbers on lotto tickets.'

"You can't lend me the £100 I asked for, only £70? Don't worry, you can own me the rest."

Squirrel Pyramid Scheme

Clancy: Borrowing Money

"It's all very well being healed, but that mobility scooter cost a fortune."

"I'm sorry, Mr Weinstock can't see you at the moment - he's on the run."

'The bank want to be sure that I don't vanish and forget the loan repayment...'

'Today, a downturn in 'social conscience' stocks on news that 'nice guys finish last'.'

Acme Firework Company

'Could you please hurry, Teller, I need to make a deposit, and quickly.'

"Here's the sick squid I owe you. . ."

Cupid views his online credit rating.