Debt Dodger's Club Pillows

'The bank want to be sure that I don't vanish and forget the loan repayment...'

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

Scapegoat of the Year

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

Hear me, Graduates!

"I know it's not in our nature, but we really gotta stop charging everything."

"Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember . . ."

'It will take all my nine lives to pay off my student loans.'

'So, who's first?'

Kicking The Habit

It's an I-O-Ewe.

"Whoops! There go those darned interest rates again!"

'Financial suicide hotline. How may I help you?'

'I think we should consider hiring a consultant to share the blame.'

"I can help you get your finances back in shape – you've just got to believe in me."

'Hello, Ma'am. I'm a college graduate selling vacuum cleaners door to door to help pay for the fortune I borrowed to take a course that had nothing to do with selling vacuums... and how are you doing?'

"Truth, whole truth, nothing but the truth? I'm not ready for that much of a commitment."

'Another hike in college tuition! The costs are already killing my folks!'

And your repayment period starts...Now!

Don't laugh, my house is paid for.

'We had a white Christmas but we'll be in the red until April.'

'Money doesn't have wings, feet or wings. My dad says that nevertheless, it disappears with the speed of light.'

"Son, I’d say the ACL tear is the least of your problems."

"The answer is NO!"

"So I figure, as long as I stay a student then I can't repay my student loans."

FIRST NATIONAL BANK OF, 'It's official, sir - EVERYBODY'S overdrawn!'