Commitment Dodger Pillows

'The groom picked the right day to chicken out!'

"Truth, whole truth, nothing but the truth? I'm not ready for that much of a commitment."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

Two grooms/wedding guests raise a glass.

"We don't have sex any more, we argue about money and you hate my mother. We should be married."

'Daniel! How many times have I told you not to bury that in the back yard! I'm going to be late for work!'

I'm putting all my eggs in one basket.

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

Unconditional Loveseat

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

How lazy people decide what to eat

The Female Brain and The Other One

'Jen, you knew when you married me, I was a 'corporate report' reading person - Not a 'summer fiction' reading person.'

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

"Phil, honey, do you ever think about taking our relationship to the next level?"

'I need someone who is willing to make a commitment not someone who's just interested in ruffling my feathers.'

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

'Whatever you do, don't tell them you think you're ready to take on more responsibility!'

'And do you promise to be the one out of two marriages that does not end in divorce.'

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

'It's been a pretty slow day -- What say we knock off a couple hours early?'

Hear me, Graduates!

"I have been happily married... three times!"