Debt-aware Dad Pillows

"This is my dad's idea of a really scary costume...the ghost of what he still owes on his student loans."

'I don't have time for throwing up.'

"It's a dependent!"

'I'm a work-at-home dad.'

'Genius! Art class and snack time!'

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

"Dad, can you read?"

"Your Covid-19 Test Results Are In..."

At the modern antenatal class.

"The kids? They're great! Karen got retweeted by a famous YouTuber and Timmy just hit 16K Insta followers. They start influencing so quickly, don't they?"

"Not now, honey. Daddy's arguing with strangers about the sexual orientation of puppets."

'One day son, all of this will be yours.'

"Dress it up all you want – it's still and invasion of my privacy."

"We put you through day-care. You're on your own now."

'Oh he's my loans officer.'

Scanning documents

"Papi, do we have enough net financial assets to meet essential living expenses for nine months if our source of income disappears?"

'He wasn't in, but I did manage to get a photo of her sitting on Santa's laptop.'

'Changing diapers isn't so bad, as long as you don't look down.'

'A couple of the other dads and I were thinking of starting up a fight club. . . you in?'

The Dad Great for Car, Home, or Office!

Dads.

'Maybe tomorrow.'

'Baby monitors make life so much easier...'

"Daddy is making sense of things."

"My four-year-old son usually helps me, but he's at his grandparents' home."

'I appreciate all you've done to help me to relax but I still get nervous twinges when I get your bill.'

Baby buying shares

"Mom, if this is putting a strain on our finances, I could take a year off."

'Once they're born they immediately begin to depreciate.'

"I didn't say download something for him, I said read to him."

"I'm sorry dad but I've found a better father figure online."

'My son's doing work experience and he helps me with the small print.'