Financially Savvy Parent Pillows

'Once they're born they immediately begin to depreciate.'

'Office' block tightening it's belt

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

Hell, "I think there's been some sort of mistake, I still owe my soul to the mortgage company"

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

'I hear the market went on quite a roller coaster ride today.'

'It's not my childhood that traumatised me. It's the size of your bills.'

'Before you return Principal Harris's phone call, I would like to remind you that having a 'living' dependant is an excellent tax deduction.'

Sunshine Retirement Villa: Pool, Golf, Tennis and Financial Planner.

'Is my allowance an unfunded liability?'

"You were the one who said we couldn't afford a new vacuum, so stop moaning and suck harder!"

"I'm so much more relaxed now that I got a reverse mortgage."

"I hate to ask for money, but I have a lot of student loans to pay off."

"Don't complain to your dad about your student loans. He's still paying his off."

"It's cut my heating bills right down."

"In going over your retirement papers, Wilcox. I've discovered you owe your soul to the company store."

"Harold, have you reaped huge gains that you have not told me about?"

"The Chancellor insists on people getting 'advice' on what to do with their pension ports if they cash them in."

"We put you through day-care. You're on your own now."

'The good news is that the person who stole your identity is spending a lot less money than you were.'

"I checked out how much it would be for hockey, and guess what? The kids are playing pickleball this year!"

"Someone forgot to pay this bill so they're repossessing our furniture."

"Papi, do we have enough net financial assets to meet essential living expenses for nine months if our source of income disappears?"

Back to school expenses.

'Dad, can I put my pocket money into a pension fund to protect me from the economic winter?'

'Those growth funds you sold me didn't work.'

Non-Profit-Organization

'It's the bank's Small Business Advisor to see you, dear.'

"Money from the Tooth Fairy, eh? Don't forget to declare capital gains!"

Staying together for the pension.

"Carl has decided that, with the economy being the way it is, he's going to be a stay at home son."

'Why don't you put your money in the Bank, instead of stuffing it under the mattress?'

'I appreciate all you've done to help me to relax but I still get nervous twinges when I get your bill.'