Debating Food Industry Gifts

"We used to think sugar and spice were all things nice - until that was proved to be a lie put out by global food manufacturers."

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"We won!"

"My smelly French cheese is much better than your Canadian beef."

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

A boy who loves cows/burgers

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

'Mom, where does bacon come from?'

'What?! Not even one of you wants to see how they're made?'

'This tuna is being recalled. It contains seahorse.'

"Sir, surely it's irresponsible to be throwing away so much edible food?"

'And since this product consists of 100% artificial ingredients, we can truthfully say it's vegan!'

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

'The dept. of agriculture says yes, the environmental protection agency says maybe, and the food and drug administration says no.'

"A foot bath after a long hard day at work is really nice!"

Angry Bulls about to try out their version of Butchering on an unsuspecting Butcher

"Beans count as healthy vegetables but jelly beans don't? Not faaaiiir!!!"

Loyd Grossman

'To eat or not to eat?'

Processed foods, unprocessed foods.

'Careful Jack - it might be a GM beanstalk!'

"How come there's a forbidden fruit but not a forbidden vegetable?"

"It's a game changer. . . carrots and hummous batons but we've managed to make them out of sugar."

"Apparently we're reared by people who share the values of the people who eat us."

Frankenfood farms: pest-resistant, fresher-longer, who-knows-what produce.

'Getting above yourself for a short order cook, aren't you?'

Mexican Seasoning Mix Mines / Polynesian Sauce Works

"Yes, it was a lovely meal wasn't it? I used a marvellous new caterer called 'pest control'."

"Wonderful - this will be the absolute best popcorn anyone has ever seen."

"Of course our products are absolutely safe!

'I've worked here for 20 years. I guess you could call me a 'seasoned' veteran.'

"Papi, we've decided we want nothing but salads...and hamburgers...for every meal."

"Apparently, some of the additives cause a nerve disorder, but others cure it."

"Dad said they'd sell like hotcakes, but they're selling like vegetables."

All Organic Pork: "Naturally smoked bacon my ass."