Dealing With A Tree Disease T-Shirts

"The disease is quite far along. . . I'm sorry, but you can kiss your ASH goodbye!"

"First time pruning?"

"Ed's tree hugging was out of control."

"Some trees in New Hampshire hate being hugged."

"Kids these days and their piercings..."

'So, how much to remove this ugly old tree? $1750. It's not THAT ugly.'

"Before I start. . . . are you sure pruning doesn't violate the tree's rights?"

Unbeknownst to many, the Frankenstein legend was in fact based on Albert Grimes, the mad tree surgeon.

'I wish to refer you to a tree surgeon. You have all the symptoms of Dutch Elm disease!'

Welcome back! What a day! As you can see, our tree has been heavily pruned, but the kind arborist has saved our nest...

'We can try to fit it with an artificial limb.'

"Let me through - I'm a bonsai tree surgeon."

Tree collapse...

"Let's hope it'll work!"

Two men driving truck that says, 'Tree surgeons without borders'.

"I will avenge you, Father."

"Voila! Our tree-trimming drone just saved us 600 bucks!'

"It's called being preemptive."

Sawrd Fighting

'Isn't nature wonderful? All those sycamore seeds fluttering over our garden - and every last one of them fertile.'

'You should see a doctor. Maybe you have that West Nile thing.'

'Looks like a perfectly healthy limb to me.'

'You've all the symptoms of Dutch elm disease, so I'm referring you to a tree surgeon!'

'My needles are falling! My bark is peeling! I must have Dutch Elm Disease!'

Tree at the barber's.

Tree growing

Doctor to Pinocchio: 'I'm referring you to a tree surgeon.'

"I love trees."

'Well, Ranger Thomas, I'm afraid you've got Dutch Elm disease!'

'You don't make house calls? But you're a tree surgeon...'

'Of course, they're healthy - they listen to me far better than my patients do.'

Cutting the tree too early?

'Human beings get all the breaks -- just TRY to get Medicare to pay for a tree surgeon!'

'It's only now that we've chopped down all the trees that we can see the damage we've done.'

Lumberjack - Yew Tube.