Deal Hustler Gifts

Worldwide Global Conglomerate, Takeover Division: 'FRIENDLY',,,'HOSTILE',

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"I just..."

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

I thought you said Megson couldn't be bought.

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

"How soon will this be a remnant

"In layman's terms, it's £12,750."

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

"The economy's been worsening for a while, but people still don't feel it, Rudy." "...Which means we still have time to get in on the despair action." "Despair action"? "We're going to expand our menu. Add more comfort foods, more 'sale' items, debt consolidation loans..." "Nobody's dumb enough to get a debt consolidation loan from some random guy." "Ha ha hoo hoo hee-"

"The pizza came late and it was cold!"

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

Online Shopping.

"All it takes is a little marketing, Tia Carmen!"

"While you make the sales presentation, Monica. I'll scope out the room and try to identify this company's Achilles heel!"

Unusual Offers

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

"Do kids eat free?"

"I thought the travel agent said 40% off."

The miracle of 2-for-1 pizza.

Engineer on the move.

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"