Dating Service Consultant Gifts

Mister, Inc: 'Wrong...Right'

"Do you have any of those books that understand men?"

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

"You've reached Randy the love doctor. What ails you?"

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

Boyfriend of the Month.

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

The Stages of Wine

"Women like funny men, but you can't go on a date dressed like that!"

Barman indicates sick bucket, alongside usual ice bucket, saying to attractive woman: 'That's there in case you hear any particularly bad chat-up lines.'

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

'Sorry, this isn't that kind of agency. We determine the age of old fossils, not arrange dates for them.'

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

"You sure are ringin' my bell, Baby!"

"You've reached Randy, the dating doctor. What ails you?"

"I'm always impressed by these matrimonial agreements, as my wife and I have never agreed on a thing."

'Standing on tiptoe waving your claw may attract a crab, but it certainly doesn't woo me.'

"To be honest, I'm a little surprised the dating service matched us up."

"I've had my eye on you for some time"

"Not so fast, Casanova! I want to get to know a man and his intentions better before I allow him to accompany me to the cinema!"

'Wow!... Look at the personality on her!'

'Dream-dates don't normally go for nightmares.'

'If you want to get anywhere with girls, you gotta PRETEND to like bunnies, ponies, and kittens.'

"The women on these dating sites don't seem to believe I'm a prince."

"That's the dating guru."

Tom prepares for his hot date.

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"I'm a simple man, really."

'Well thank you Igor!! I spend all night making small talk with the blonde and Mr. googly eyes has to show up!!'

'How do you like your egg?'

"At least have the decency to send her a text to tell her you're not interested."

Babe magnet