Dating Scene Superstar T-Shirts

"She's just being Koi."

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

"I just love a nice knight out."

"I said, 'You must be waiting for 'Mr. Right,' too.'"

'I'm a star!'

Open Mike for the spotlight operators

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

'Your place or mine? Both. You go to your place and I'll go to mine!'

"You are the weakest wink...goodbye."

'Excellent. But try it again and this time start your sway at the beginning of the fourth bar, O.K.?'

Alligator Bars

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

'You have the right to remain silent. . .'

Magician creates magic square

"Yes, Your Honor, I'm Mr. Brandon, Mr. Shindelbower's attorney, along with his agent and publicist."

"So, tell me, how many guys have you slept with?"

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."

Ventriloquist's dummy reads 'Computers for dummies'.

"Huge fan."

He's Tasty!

'You were wrong, Bob, that wasn't her come-hither look!'

"Does it occur to you that the only thing separating us is a basket of bar snacks? And a flimsy basket at that?"

Cilla Black

Chick Magnet

'Yes, I need to move: I'm starting to have a reputation on the bachelor scene here...'

Northern chat up lines: 'You don't sweat much for a fat lass'